The New Consumer Living Inside Algorithms

I’ve been noticing how tired people feel lately.

Not “busy” tired… not “long week” tired.
Another kind of exhaustion… the kind that sits beneath everything.
It took me a while to name it.
Sure, things are expensive and we’re all complaining about it, but I’m starting to see the root cause… and it should give all leaders pause.
We’re living inside systems that feel playable… but not predictable.
Rules that exist… but don’t feel stable.
Outcomes that look earned… until they suddenly aren’t.
Tickets… queues… algorithms… access… personalized pricing.

Scarcity disguised as fairness.

You do everything right… and still lose.
Or you win… and don’t know why.
That ambiguity creates a particular kind of stress.
Not acute… chronic.
And it has a huge impact on how anybody can build a brand.

This really crystallized while editing my conversation with Judd Kessler on this week’s episode of Thinking With Mitch Joel.

Judd studies how people behave inside lotteries, waitlists and gameable systems… the kinds we now swim in every day (his new book, Lucky by Design – The Hidden Economics You Need to Get More Of What You Want, is a great read).
What struck me wasn’t the economics… it was the exhausting psychology.

When outcomes feel random and consequential, people don’t relax… they strategize… they stress.

And when everything becomes a strategy, shopping quietly turns into work.
We start gaming instead of trusting.
Optimizing instead of engaging.
Refreshing instead of resting.
You don’t just buy a ticket… you study the release pattern.
You don’t just apply… you reverse-engineer the process.
You don’t just show up… you calculate timing and positioning.

Over time, that changes how you feel about the stuff you love to (or have to) buy.

Merit starts to feel suspicious.
Luck starts to feel personal.
And fairness begins to feel like a performance.
The strange thing is… many of these systems were designed to be fairer.
Lotteries instead of backroom deals.
Algorithms instead of gatekeepers.
Rules instead of favors.

But living inside them doesn’t feel that way at all.

Because when you can’t tell whether effort matters, you don’t stop trying… you just stop believing (sorry, Journey).
And that belief gap is corrosive.
It makes people cynical instead of curious.
Competitive instead of collaborative.
Exhausted instead of hopeful.

Culturally, we’re normalizing a world where everything feels provisional.

Access is temporary… attention is rented.
Opportunity is conditional.
And personally… that does something to you.
You start scanning instead of settling.
Preparing for rejection even while succeeding.
Holding wins lightly… and losses heavily.

Judd helped me see that the real damage isn’t losing the game… it’s never knowing whether the game respects you.

Which raises an uncomfortable question… especially for leaders.
If you design systems that people must live inside…
Do they create clarity… or anxiety?
Trust… or connection?
Energy… or resentment?

Because people don’t just experience outcomes… they experience the process of getting there.

And process shapes behavior long before results show up.
I don’t think we’re just tired because work is hard.
I think we’re tired because everything feels gameable…
and no one ever tells you when you’ve had a “win”.
So here’s the question I’ve been noodling around:

Are we building systems that reward effort… or systems that quietly drain it?… And do we even notice the difference anymore?

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